Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Updates & Stuff

~ I will be attending TEDxCMU this Sunday ! Watch it live on April 3 at http://bit.ly/c9IXPS #tedxcmu. If you want to meet up for lunch please e-mail me.

~ A new workshop in May will be held at WYEP Community Broadcast Center. Register info coming soon.

~ In July I will giving a talk at Upper St Clair Health fair on “Faith & Creativity.

~ Be sure to check out my “Workshop” page for class that had to be reschedule.

~ Jimmy Fallon is funny!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Lessons from Suffering

My life was forever changed at the time of the birth of my daughter. I became a Father and I became a man who would keep a secret.

The reason I started this blog was for my daughter, who was born 5 yrs ago. I wanted to leave her a body of archival (searchable) work that she could look back upon if she wished. I wanted this body of work to represent to her who her Father is and to understand the “how” and the “why” of me.

I was diagnosed with a disease and handed a newborn baby within days of each other.

Confession: I am a healthy person who suffers with long bouts of illness. In between periods of health where I am clear minded, clean bodied and full of energy, I suffer for months, in truth a season, of illness. Seasons that start off at Thanksgiving and does not end until Easter. This is not about holiday depression, it just happens to be the season of my illness. I have an autoimmune disease. It starts off with fatigue, then a cold, then flu, next an infection leading to long periods of being in bed resigned to repeat this process over and over.

This blog is a love letter to my daughter that I titled “Working Portfolio”. In keeping this journal I have kept my illness a secret. I did not want to share with her that Dad is not Superman. I wanted to share with her the significance of showing up daily to life. A life I lead with purpose, effort, love and humor.

This illness is suffering (at times) in which it affects my entire household, not just me. It affects my extended family. It affects my community of friends. It affects the entire whole of my being.

I want to share some of the things that I have learned living with an autoimmune disease. Future writings will most likely not be about life with an illness. But at this time I wanted to be truthful to who I am and to my daughter and I wanted to write down my life lessons learned.

Lessons I learned from suffering:

Suffering is just that, suffering, nothing more.

Suffering is mindfulness; it gives you the ability to experience a singular moment.

Suffering is a journey through your interiors, it show you the tiniest details of yourself.

Suffering is perspective, it gives you the vision of foresight to see the next fifty years of your life.

Suffering is a balancing act of every moment of wakefulness.

Suffering is not art, it is not fuel for creativity, it is not divine, and it is pain.

Suffering is awareness


Suffering awakens you to your place in this world…and that is good information to know.

I am not a preacher, just a photographer who suffers at times with bouts of illness. For the bulk of this illness I am a functioning addict of wellness. I get up, shower, drink coffee, do yoga, sit on a meditation mat and go about life creating lots of photos.

Not allowing the shadow of this illness be any more than that; a second shadow that I carry with me. At times the darkness of that second shadow overcomes me, becoming strong and overtaking me. Then I suffer.

Then I get up, again, as I promise to you that I will always do.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Be Not Afraid

It’s been awhile since I last wrote something on this blog. I should have something profound to say at this point, but I do not. Been fighting a handful of infections, toss in a virus or two and I become a very boring dinner companion.

Time off was going to be a time of long walks (I did get of few in), studying yoga with a teacher and writing about “Faith & Creativity” while sitting in random coffeehouses around Pittsburgh.

The good news is that I was asked to speak at a Health Fair this July on the topic of “ Faith & Creativity”. How ironic that the offer came at my most un-healthiest? Must be a message in there somewhere. Did I use ironic correctly? While on grammar I use the words “ have been” too much in my writing. I need a better phrase of words. If you have suggestions e-mail me.

The one thing that I do wish to leave you with is the quote: “Be not afraid”. Pope John Paul II wrote a book on this topic: “Crossing the Threshold of Hope” where throughout the book his one running theme is “Be not afraid”. It was one of the those books that spoke to me. It gave me ideas and dreams that I still carry. The book is written in a universal-Catholic (as meant by the Greek phrase to mean “whole”), simply meaning if you are not Catholic this book is still for you.

The reason I bring this book up is because fear is too often a main theme in conversations with people. My workshops are coming to a close this month but they will restart in the Fall. I have had the opportunity to speak to well over 1,000 people on the topic of creating a photograph. The one constant word is “fear”... fear of not being good enough.

My advice to all has been fail, fail often, enjoy the failure, and fail forward. Failure is the creative process.

Be not afraid. Life has purpose.

Maybe I did have something profound to say? You decide.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Annie O'Neill: Work in Progress Photography Exhibition


Very excited to pass on a recommendation. Our good friend, Annie O'Neill, will be having a photography exhibition at the Filmmakers Galleries in Oakland. The showing will runs from March 21 thru April 17, but an opening reception will be held on Friday, March 26 from 6 - 8 pm. Very interesting, very talented work. Definitely worth the night out.

See you there.